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Dia Luein

by Cedarwell

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1.
Grand Rapids 06:05
Grand Rapids, Michigan, you got a long way to go. You got a hard place to fall. You gotta take your time. Take your time. Fathers are dying— you couldn't wait for an answer, but I can wait till I die, when all the windows are open like it's a break in dimension. Some might turn away . . . but I won't. Warmed by the lightning of a strong and holy spirit It's speaking words and puking swords. Then it will slice to the center of the deepest form of being. Some might shy away . . . but I don't. Come separation, zip up your lips and keep quiet! There are no words! There is nothing but a belief that resistance comes in the form of acceptance. Some might shy away . . . but I won't. Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh When I dream, I dream of Grand Rapids! Taking all my steps in stride. (Grand Rapids!) When I fall, I fall from Grand Rapids! What a solitary life. (Grand Rapids!) Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh Grand Rapids, Michigan, you got a long way to go. You got a hard place to fall. You got a heart-heavy load. You got a long way to go. You better take your time. Take your time.
2.
Take a look at your life, it's the real thing. (when you notice the doubts start a-rising) In the wing of a swan, in the blackest of skins, in a maze of mirrors within, I’ve got a secret . . . but I’m gonna keep it! Take a look at my heart, that's a love true. you can follow its lead when you don’t know what to do. It’s a motherless child. It’s a cyclical growth. It expands like the universe—didn’t you know? I know the right road . . . that’s where I intend to go! Take a look at the world—that's the real deal. You can let it affect how you feel. It's an infinite sound. It’s a secret design. It controls time—yours and mine. I got a secret, but I'm gonna keep it . . .
3.
Crossing the ocean shouldn't take too long now that we understand how the west wind blows. Take all the moments stick ‘em in your hand. They are the only thing that can save us. Come back to my town we can start a home. I am an honest man—you'll understand in time. Maybe the winter will not last so long. Consider the atmosphere in the morning. Didn't want two sets of eyes or an escape from my old life. But now I want you . . . and I want it too Don't want to Skype all the time or want to want to be online But now I want you . . . and I want it too. And I want it too. And I want it toooooo.
4.
For You 02:40
For you, I would cross the desert for the drop of water to wet your tongue. For you, I would gather roses in a field of thorns and mark your path For you, I would swallow rain clouds through the stormy weather till the day is new. For you. For you, I would hold the bullet in my failing heart if yours stayed true. For you. For you. For you.
5.
There are days in my life when I look at the world like the swirl of a dream like it seems to me now. Then my head starts to spin. Am I in? Am I out? What's it all about? Oh, man! Then I shiver. I shake. I take all of the weight and I carry it far for no reason at all but to feel . . . that I'm real. And you’re real. and it’s reeeeeeeeeeeeeal!! Stacks and stacks of photographs are not enough to change the past but where time goes it won't come back from. (No, no, no.) I studied ancient history. It’s algebra, mythology. But even what's in front of me is a mystery. (Yeah!!) Quarks and quantum molecules split shit up and broke the rules. And now I'm just a useless tool in a shutdown shed. But I'm real. And you’re real. And it's reeeeeeeeeal!! There's a couple of things that will never descend to the depths of my doubts where it's darker than hell and I can't feel . . . if you’re real—or I’m real. But we're real.
6.
Only Child 04:21
When the rain came, I was sleeping. When the phone rang, I answered: “I am an only child. We are an only child.” Took a long walk by the river with my lover in the morning. Then the sun spoke like a stranger: “We are an only child. We are an only child.” We are an only child. Only child. Only child. Only child. Worked a small town with my brother tossing water like it’s nothing. We share a mother--tied to each other. But I am another--he is another--child. There’s a tree in the forest growing leaves in the winter. Oh, what a miracle! Oh, what a steady hand! Oh, what a commonplace in this foreign land! Oh, what a genocide! Oh, what a tangled lie! Oh, what a solitary life! I want to live like there’s no tomorrow! (but tomorrow comes anyway) I want to fill up my heart with sorrow! (but I am an only child) Only child.
7.
Commonplace 07:00
Stuck in a college town with no escaping. I looked around and round through the weekend, placing bets on the day that you left. (I didn’t know back then.) Where is the solid ground to rely on? I know I walked it once so I'm trying to recollect with a wooden Circle a string of promises (What is the light trapped inside the night taking all my dreams like the clouds from the sky?) Dissecting time to find out a reason for what a minute means without seconds. Or what's a year if it never passes? I contemplate the crazed resurrection. If this life ain't right I'll wait for the next one— in a series of Second Chances all bundled up in one. (What is the light trapped inside the night taking all my dreams like the clouds from the sky?) Whatever you want, whatever you need, whatever is true, whatever is free, whatever is commonplace.
8.
Tossing a dream from the edge of my bed. Leftover whiskey is hurting my head. Well, I mumbled out something (not sure what I said). Something about how the daylight’s a thief taking the dreams that I wanted to keep (well, at least let me decide the time that they leave). Then, in the morn’ over coffee and eggs, I sat with my friend and prepared for the day (I said none of the things that I wanted to say (and I will regret it forever)).

about

Cedarwell's new album is called Dia Luein. Because of physical distance and life in general, we could only work on it a few days a year since 2016 and finally finished in 2020! The result of that process was a batch of 8 songs that span great emotional, geographic, and narrative distance—songs from the simplicity of single late-twenties life and from the excitement of new love/fatherhood and from the devastating confusion of separation in its myriad forms—always leaving and returning, searching for birth and life . . . and finding it!—but finding, too, the shadowy fringes of death and loss.

All eight songs were recorded at Honeytone in Neenah, WI - a world class studio built inside a beautiful victorian mansion.

credits

released April 2, 2021

Music: Erik G. Neave, Jeff Patlingrao, & Jared Beckman
Lyrics: Erik G. Neave

Vocals, Rhythm/Bass Guitars, Banjo & Septavox : Erik G. Neave
Lead Guitars & Sonic Screwdriver: Jeff Patlingrao
Drums & Harmony Vocals: Jared Beckman
Piano/Keys/Synth: Marty Brueggemann
Banjo: Jacquelyn Beaupré

Special Guest Vocals
- Crossing the Ocean & Black Swan Self-Help: Jacquelyn Beaupré
- Leftover Whiskey: Monica Martin
- Grand Rapids: Matt Holmen & Jason Krunnfusz

Produced, recorded, & mixed by Patrick Boland, Marty Brueggemann and Jeff Patlingrao at Honeytone Studio in Neenah, WI.

Mastered by Gavin Lurssen at Lurssen Mastering in Los Angeles, CA

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Cedarwell Sheboygan, Wisconsin

Cedarwell is a song-centered, 3 piece rock band from the Midwest. Erik G. Neave writes intricate lyrics augmented by Jeff Patlingrao's space/time-bending electric guitar work and driven by Jared Beckman's distinctive stand-up drum style.

Their forthcoming album, Dia Luein, comes in April and includes 8 unreleased tracks recorded at Honeytone Studios in Neenah, WI.
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